“This is our place to relax; you can’t enjoy it…
What’s it to you?
Who do you think you are?”
Perhaps because I hate going to government offices, my civil-servant friends are always preparing surprises for me. I thought you might like to find out what preparations my civil-servant friends, who prepare surprises for me every time, have made for me once again without so much as a grumble!
With the feelings of an ordinary person who senses that a surprise is being planned for their birthday and is very excited, I went to the office where my civil-servant friends were supposed to be. And what did I find out? My friends had left that place and moved somewhere else. As the first office I visited gave me this information, the other civil servants who provided it had looks of deep annoyance in their eyes because I had interrupted their very busy working hours… As I left the office I had mistakenly gone to, with the innocence of a child who had committed a crime, my head bowed and my heart heavy with sorrow at having taken up civil servants’ time. Unfortunately, this would not be my first mistake!
When I went to the new location I’d been given for my “jokester” civil-servant friends, finding them took a considerable amount of my time. It was as if the state were taking revenge on me for the first mistake I’d made. Anyway, as I knocked on the doors of the rooms one by one, with the excitement of someone about to be surprised, I could feel my heart beating faster. But one of the room doors was locked, while the other two stood wide open, and my jokester friends were nowhere to be seen. My sorrowful heart led me down to the lower floors. Where were my most esteemed jokester friends? Fortunately, another civil-servant friend on the lower floors, whom I went over to see and who, I think, was getting a recipe over the phone, was gracious enough to cut off their conversation and not only attend to me but also give me the code: “Knock hard; they’ll be in there,” they said. I went straight back upstairs. Now I knew the code and would do what was necessary. I knocked hard, and when there was still no answer, I gathered my courage and went inside… Well, well, well—my jokester civil-servant friends were having a coffee party for me. I understood why the rooms had been empty; everyone was there, drinking coffee and lighting cigarettes, talking loudly about something. I’m sure they had opened a discussion titled “How can we provide better service to our people?” But I still don’t understand why, when I came in, they didn’t all shout “Surpriiiiise!” together. Anyway, after the greetings, I had to explain the reason for my visit… without even having a coffee.
I had to make a phone call about the reason for my visit, so I stepped out onto the balcony. Once I’d finished talking, I went back inside to the friend I’d told about my problem. My jokester civil-servant friend’s expression and manner suddenly changed, and with an anger I couldn’t understand, they said to me: “This may be a relaxed environment, but you can’t talk on the phone on the balcony.” I had made a huge mistake: I’d talked on the phone on the balcony of my friends, whose comfortable lives were funded in no small part by the taxes I pay, while they were enjoying cigarettes and coffee and thinking about how they could provide me with even better service at the place I’d gone to receive it. Whatever you do, don’t repeat my mistakes!
What was it to me? Who was I? How could I take advantage of their place for doing as they pleased? I ask myself these questions, and in fact, I too want to ask a question: Heeey, those in charge, how is it that when there are almost three civil servants for every citizen living in our country, we receive service that is so difficult to get, so poor and so humiliating?
Please be respectful in traffic?
‘Global’ Populism---5.11.2008 “In our globalizing world, systems are no longer as they used to be…” “As global warming affects the whole world, we…” “While the global financial crisis is affecting the country’s economy, measures have been taken…” We love making grand statements; I think it makes us feel important. We don’t put much effort into it. In fact, we think a few magic words at the beginning of a sentence are enough; they make us feel that we’ve said something important to the other person. We exaggerate… Sometimes, even we don’t know what the things we say after these magic words mean. The bad thing is, the other person doesn’t pay much attention to that either. They say, “This man is saying important things,” and don’t care about the rest. A remarkable network of communication suddenly forms: everyone says something, and it doesn’t matter who says what! What matters is what they said at the beginning.
We actually love talking nonsense, making ourselves seem important as though we were making grand pronouncements. I suppose we want to be important, but we try to take a shortcut and do it by rote. We don’t read, we don’t research, we don’t know… We don’t want the people we’re speaking to know that we don’t know. We speak in the voices of people we think know what they’re talking about. Before long, everyone starts talking about the same thing, and different people repeating the same sentences surround us on all sides. We enjoy all talking about the same thing together, in almost exactly the same words.
Of course, there are some among us who try to stand out from the crowd! Our friends who gather different information from different sources begin to speak as if they were wise, saying, “Of course, there’s this other aspect to the issue,” and immediately distinguish themselves—while winning our respect, too. We say, “This person is very knowledgeable,” and suddenly accept our own ignorance. At that moment, excitement takes hold of us, and we grow impatient, thinking that we must use what we’ve learned from this person somewhere right away. And we do use it, generously… Now we too become popular, like everyone else talking about the subject. Even if we know nothing about a popular topic, we have our comments ready to recite, and we become just like the others…
The system runs like clockwork. We look around and see the world talking about globalization, so we immediately put the phrase “in our globalizing world” at the start of almost every sentence. We defend it or oppose it; we have an opinion on the subject and display our wisdom. But suddenly the agenda changes and an environmental problem emerges. That doesn’t matter to us! We replace the phrase “in our globalizing world” at the beginning of our sentences with “the effects of global warming.” Suddenly, we have an opinion on this subject too. Well, the agenda changes rapidly in a global world! Just as we’ve warmed to “global warming,” we look around and see that a global financial crisis has broken out… But that doesn’t matter either! As if trying to outdo magicians, we put “global financial crisis” at the beginning of our existing sentence formula without even saying abracadabra, and suddenly we have an opinion on this subject too. There’s no need to learn, research, or create!
In other words, we have an opinion on everything.
In other words, we can talk about everything.
In other words, we are wise…
Who are we, you ask?
How about looking around you with this in mind?
I want to talk about a group who don’t pretend to know, but who do justice to what they are trying to do. “Unreal,” who performed at Old Tunnel the other evening—a band I’ve had the chance to hear many times before—were magnificent once again. I told Serkan, who runs Old Tunnel: “Serkan, you know what you’re doing, bro,” I said… Anyway, the band members were doing what they knew best on stage. Without straying, changing their style, or losing their simplicity and originality… They were a perfect example of doing what you know how to do. So, thank you, “Unreal.”
That’s all for today!
Please pay attention to your surroundings, and please be respectful in traffic.
The Kings’ Test---6.11.2008
“You’ve only been doing this for a year; how dare you claim to be a master…
Madam Teacher, this is how we train people… (And what’s it to you?)
We are the rules here. Ehuheueheu”
The other day, I heard about another incident—this time from someone else—that could serve as an example for my article “Government Offices (A Place for Doing as You Please).” When I was told about it, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I wonder if you’ll believe it when you read the lines below in which I try to tell you what I was told. I’m genuinely curious!
The incident takes place somewhere the state administers practical vocational exams. In other words, this time the place chosen as a “Place for Doing as You Please” is a venue where exams are held. When it comes to exams, arbitrary practices naturally have a direct bearing on the lives of those taking them. As a result, people suffer, and people are made to suffer.
So how are people made to suffer?
Inconsistent Grades:
The inconsistency among those who make the decisions in the exam—in other words, those entitled to award grades—is a major factor in people’s suffering. In fact, this is the root of the problem! The four teachers entitled to award grades are made up of two teachers from the Ministry of National Education who teach the relevant trade, and two “so-called teachers” who work in that trade and earn money from it. At first glance, this may seem like a reasonable arrangement, but when people’s egos, desires, and ambitions come together, inconsistency is inevitable. It’s all too easy for those who earn money from this work to block the path of people hoping to enter the same profession. They have the power to do so. The bad thing is, they know it, and it seems that the mutual interest groups that form over time influence the other—so-called—graders. As you can imagine, these relationships of mutual interest amount to: you give a grade to my person, and I’ll give a grade to yours…
Kingdom:
If someone gives you power and you’re unable to handle it—in other words, if you have the kind of character that can wield it and say, “I’m the king here; what I say goes”—then you’ve effectively been given a kingdom, even if it’s a small one. And you use it to the fullest, forgetting that the people you’re crushing are human beings, perhaps trying to make their way in life with this exam as their only hope. Just as those living in palaces forget those outside them… You’re a king now; the others are wretched people, and their lives depend on a few words from your mouth. Perhaps you’re aware of that, but you don’t care; it doesn’t matter to you. You enjoy the brief reign you’ve been given. Perhaps you don’t want to miss this moment because at home, at work, or among your loved ones, no one listens to you. Who can say?
So-Called Educators:
Picture the behavior and attitudes of people driven by all these feelings, unable to free themselves from their egos, convinced they are kings, and at the same time earning money from this work while attempting to grade those who hope to enter their own profession. And wait, there’s more: take into account their claims to be educators… What kind of picture did you see? I realize it’s a picture that’s hard even to imagine. While it’s difficult even to imagine, think about those in our country trying to advance in this profession and having to shape their lives around the words these people utter.
Don’t be surprised! No doubt it happens to you too, in different ways…
Don’t ask where this happens! Think of the places where master-level exams are being held right now…
Don’t ask why I’m writing this! Speak out about the arbitrary practices you encounter in your own “Places for Doing as You Please”!
Who knows, I might hear your cries and write about them.
Please pay attention to your surroundings, and please be respectful in traffic.